Christmas

Momma,

Merry Christmas! Today is December 25, 2013. This is the very first Christmas that I have spent away from you in 24 years. I only cried a few times today. I am taking a break from packing to write you this Christmas letter. Tomorrow I am leaving with 2 of the biddies to head up to Plattsburgh, NY for Rozzie's wedding weekend! The rest of the biddies are going to get there on Friday. 

This morning when I woke up I did some things to get ready for that. Dad decided that he didn't want to open presents at our house this year because he wanted it to be different. 

I remember last Christmas you had cried for most of the day. I didn't understand it then but now I see why. You had known all along...that was your last Christmas with us. You hadn't yet told us that the chemo wasn't working so I never would have thought that it was our last Christmas. I love you for being so brave like that for us.


We hauled all of the wrapped gifts over to Deb and John's. We went over there around 11:30 and we opened gifts for a while. We ate around 2pm, I think. 

Everyone got some really cool gifts this year. Dad got Lindsay and I kayaks! I can't wait to try it out this summer! 


Deb and John got dad a heater for the back porch because he spends so much time out there and it is always freezing! We all chipped in for John's present which was the PS4. Lindsay got running clothes and other things that she picked out herself at Macy's. And today we told Deb that she has two months to train for the Disney Princess Half Marathon! She freaked out but is looking forward to it. 

I also received a lot of running gear which might make you think that I love running. That isn't exactly the case but I like the gifts anyway. 


I got lots of other cool things but it is all just stuff. Don't get me wrong, I love it all but I would give it all away to have you back! 

Momma, dad wrote us each letters today to let us know that he would like us to each choose one piece of your jewelry to have as our very own. He wants to go over all of the pieces with us and tell is where they came from, etc. If two of us want the same piece then that piece gets eliminated and we have to choose something else. He doesn't want us to fight over any of it. Mommy, he said that you would want us to have your jewelry instead of just let it sit to collect dust. I hope it's okay if we start wearing it. I know how much you loved your jewelry so I promise to take excellent care of it.

Today is the day that God sent Jesus down to Earth, to live and ultimately die, so that when our time here is up, we can can ascend into Heaven to be with Him for eternity. Mommy, I can't believe that you already reached eternity. Sometimes I think that this means that you must have been the best because God said that your work was already finished here. I have no idea if that is true and I know that I am biased but I like to think that anyway. Even though I feel so blessed to have had you as my mom, you knew that you weren't perfect. I want to strive to be more like Jesus, just as you did. You never saw money, or color, or differences, or hate, or any of that.  You were very good at loving people just as they are. We are broken people but God loves us anyway and just wants to be with us. He knows that I know I will be seeing you again, one day, in Heaven, our forever home. 

Some year, of which I don't know that date, you will see me on the guest list at Jesus' birthday party! How was it Mommy? I just know that you had the very best time! 

We still hung your stocking this year, right next to Grandma's. I can't believe we lost two family members this year. Momma, you will always be our caboose. Your home is Heaven now but you will never leave our hearts. 


I haven't heard the song Christmas Shoes at all this year and I'm not sure if I want to. You know that song but I'll remind you anyway. The little boy hoped to buy shoes for his mama because he wanted to her look beautiful if she met Jesus that night. On April 8th, your body was frail and weak, chemo had taken a lot of your hair, and in your tired eyes we could see that you were ready to go. Momma, I know that Jesus thought you were stunning when you met Him that night!


Mommy, I miss you so much, not only today, but everyday! I'll see you again soon! 

Love always and forever,
Kelsey

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