Just a Monday

Hey Coco,

I really miss you today so I wanted to write you a letter. Everytime a Monday comes, I know it's been another week since I've seen you. I eventually lost track but today I counted and it has been 29 weeks since I've seen you. 203 days (to be exact).

I want to see you again so very badly. That is no secret, I'm sure. I didn't a little math to calculate how many more weeks I would have to wait to see you again if I got to meet Jesus at the exact age (in weeks) that you did, 57yrs+40wks. 

When you left us on April 8, you had spent 3,004 weeks on this Earth. I was at 23yrs+46wks. My total number of weeks was 1,242.

3,004-1,242=1,762 weeks. 

I have checked off 29 of those weeks. 
1,762-29=1,733 weeks.

1,733. That is how many weeks I would have to wait (from today) to see you again IF I left this Earth at 57yrs and 40wks, just like you did. That feels like forever. 

Someone might read this and say that it probably wasn't emotionally healthy to do all of those calculations. And I guess that's just really none of their business. I want you to come back so so so much. But I know you can't, because I'm certain that you are happy there! I know that you must be because you said you were ready to get there. I do wonder sometimes if your heart hurt (like ours did) knowing you had to leave us. Or if you were just too tired and in too much pain to understand any of that during the last few days. 
Someday when I get to Heaven I am going to ask you if you knew. And I don't know what you will say but I do know that you will say that you have been loving me since the moment you last saw me. 

This upcoming Sunday is All Saints Day. I will write more about that later.

Momma have a good night! I'm sure night isn't a real thing up there so when I write that, what I really mean is, I hope my tears stop falling soon.

Love,
Kelsey

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Six Months

Image
Mommy, Hi! It's a milestone month...month 6. Where has the time gone? Some days I feel as though the time passes like a flash of lightning and other times I feel like the days drag on and I become frustrated about how far away seeing you again, really is. Here come the tears. They always come. This time, they are just freely flowing out of my eyes. I can't keep up with wiping them away right now, so I am letting them slide down my cheeks, over my lips. The tears that miss my lips fall onto my shirt, but I don't mind, because this day is almost over. It is October now. October 8, 2013. Fall is here and it has now been two seasons since you passed. September was hard because you had hoped that you could stay on Earth until that month. And I feel the same way, I wanted more time with you. Momma, those extra months would have never been enough. A few days ago I read through some of the cards you sent me while at college. Here are a couple that I love... This was a
Read more

The Year of Running

Image
Hello World, It's me, Kelsey. I don't actually have a plan for this post but I should start by being honest...today's day is actually February 23, 2015. This post is time-stamped back in December but I haven't gotten around to writing it yet. Today's date is significant though...exactly one year ago today I was chasing that Princess Half dream, 13.1 miles down the road. So today seems like a good day to write about my year of running. To get a clear picture of how this year of running came to be we should time travel back to June 11, 2013. The day that registration opened for the 2014 Disney Princess Half Marathon. A number of my friends and I had decided that we were going to do this. My phone reminded me all week that registration would open on June 11. When that day came, I was completely terrified. I knew I wanted to do it but the reality of it was that I really had never run more than 3-4 miles...ever. I held my breath, typed in my credit card information and h
Read more

Heavenly Mail

I know Heaven is real. I cannot wait to get there and see my momma again. I wonder what Heaven is like? I try not to think too much about it because the thought of "forever" can be overwhelming for me.  I write letters to my momma on here. Does she read them? I don't know. I hope so and that alone is enough to keep me writing. When I was little I used to think that people in Heaven could see everything that I was doing. Today, that just doesn't make sense. I don't think my mom can look down and see me. It is too sad down here on Earth. I am too sad. She wouldn't want to see that. Heaven is filled with only joy and no tears or suffering. If my mom could see my pain it would question the validity of everything we know about Heaven. Or at least everything we think we know about Heaven.  So how do I talk to my momma? I simply talk to God. He is the Creator of the Universe. If He can't be a messenger, than who can? I tell Him to hug her or tell her that I love
Read more